. . . a series of unfortunate events . . .

. . . it's no secret . . .
. . . our garage is jinxed . . .

. . . there was the time that
bill left his guitar,
in its case,
leaning against the garage wall . . .
{little known fact ~ acoustics in the garage are great}
. . . he drove in the next day
in his fancy mazda rx7,
which has a long front end . . .
. . . accidentally tapping the guitar case
with the front of the car . . .
. . . outcome? car, case and guitar
were perfectly fine . . .
. . . inside? we had to re-drywall,
repair the tile baseboards,
and re-wallpaper the entryway . . .

. . . then there was the time that
the water heater's overflow pan . . .
. . . well, apparently, it overflowed . . .
. . . and eventually all that
water and soggy drywall and insulation
had to go somewhere . . .
. . . i'm just glad
the water heater is located
in the attic above the garage,
instead of over the family room . . .
. . . because it was a big, fat mess . . .
. . . good thing bill's new caddy
wasn't home at the time . . .
. . . then there was the time that
the cabinets
{we took them out of the old laundry room and
relocated them to the garage,
then i stuffed them full of
25 year old cans of wheat ~
obviously a little too full}
came crashing down
~ cabinets, wheat, cans and all ~
onto the hood of rosie, the suburban . . .. . . then there was the time that

we came home from
a suns game one night
and a while later,
i kept hearing
this weird crackling noise . . .
. . . i could hear it in the house,
but finally figured out
it was coming from the garage . . .
. . . even leonard and fran
look puzzled by this one . . .
. . . we still don't know
what happened to that window . . .
. . . then, perhaps
the most unfortunate event of all
occurred not in the garage,
but in the living room,
when i chose this wallpaper . . .
. . . for which i have since repented . . .